REACH FOR THE GOAL!

Feb 012013
 

By Esther Jantzen, guest poster 

A great thing to teach children is how to get something done. Often kids want to accomplish something, but they don’t know how to start or where to get supplies or what to do next. Yet reaching a goal is a satisfying adventure! The first step is to imagine it completed just the way you want it to be in your mind. Once you clearly know what you want, it’s easier to take the next action steps.

Here are steps to teach your children:

 1) Ask your children to tell you about something they really want. It could be a small or large goal, a skill they want to develop, an interest they want to expand, or something they want to own. For example, a child may want to build a tree house, be on a sports team, make a birthday card, have a special costume for Halloween, learn to ride a bike, dig a hole to China in the backyard, become a bird-watcher, own a pet, etc.

2) Ask your children, ‘What could that look like and feel like?” Let them pretend seeing it in their mind’s eye. Ask appropriate questions: Does it have a color? How big is it? How do you feel when you imagine having it? How would you use it? Would you share it with anybody? Would you need a place for it? What would happen if you had it or could do it? (It’s possible they may start by telling you what their goal is NOT like. That’s fine, as it may be part of the process of getting things clear.) Let them enjoy their imaginations, for the human imagination is creative, powerful, and useful.

3) Next, invite your children to talk about all the things or experiences they would need to reach this goal. Write down these ideas or steps on a sheet of paper.

4) Then ask your children, “What’s the very first thing you need to do to achieve this?” Guide them to identify one single next step. It might be getting a phone number, asking for help, gathering supplies, making space in a room, or starting to save money. Help them take that first step. And then identify the next one… and the one after that….

5) Support your children over time to stick with their goals by consistently encouraging them to take the next action step. Assisting kids to create a plan to go for what they want is a hugely valuable gift! 

Reach for the Goal! supports the English-Language Arts Content Standards related to organizing information and sequencing ideas.

Esther Jantzen, Ed.D, is a mother, an educator and the author of Plus It! How to Easily Turn Everyday Activities into Learning Adventures for Kids available at www.plusitbook.com and the Way to Go! Family Learning Journal available through www.jantzenbooks.com

High Quality Compliments!

Jan 112013
 

by Esther Jantzen, guest poster

Children thrive when grown-ups point out their good qualities and the things they are doing well. Compliments are some of the best gifts you can give your child.

This activity teaches kids words they might not know. Here are several ways to do it: below are 45 words for positive traits. See if you can add 15 more to the list:

Active, determined, kind, adventurous, energetic, lively, artistic, enthusiastic, loving, aware, expressive, observant, beautiful, forgiving, open, bold, friendly, patient, brave, generous, powerful, bright, gentle, ready-to-learn, capable, handsome, respectful, caring, happy, responsible, changing, hard-working, sensitive, confident, honest strong, cooperative, imaginative, thoughtful, creative, inventive, unique, dependable, joyful, wise

1) Write each family member’s name on a separate piece of paper. Either alone or with others, write as many positive words as you can think of to describe each person. Give the paper to them.

2) When you find a family member doing a positive behavior, tell them! Tell them the specific instance when you saw that behavior. For example, say, “You sure were being gentle when you held that kitten.” Or, “I liked how energetically and quickly you picked up the papers from the floor.”

Compliments supports the English-Language Arts Content Standards related to vocabulary and concept development.

Esther Jantzen, Ed.D, is a mother, an educator and the author of Plus It! How to Easily Turn Everyday Activities into Learning Adventures for Kids available at www.plusitbook.com and the Way to Go! Family Learning Journal available through www.jantzenbooks.com

Am I An Old Fuddy Duddy?

Jan 112013
 

by Keyuri Joshi, guest poster

I was driving my son to school the other morning when it was still dark outside. The car in front of us had two small TV screens that were playing what looked like Spongebob Squarepants outwitting a rogue amoeba. I wondered why kids needed to watch TV shows during seemingly short car rides.

When my son was younger, I recall occupying car time with thrilling stories on CD’s, singing, or silly games like “I Spy”, “The Alphabet Game” or “Name the States”. The older my son got, and with no distractions in the car, the more “quality conversations” we had. Many of them were simply priceless opportunities to render teaching and to bond.

Yesterday, my family was dining at a casual restaurant. In the booth across from us was a toddler about age three. He ate some dinner, but mostly played on his mom’s iPhone while his parents conversed. I felt concerned. Not only was this child not interacting with his parents, he was occupied by handheld electronics for nearly 90 minutes. The story repeats itself with kids on airplanes as well. I rarely see them curled up with books. It seems to me like it’s the norm that kids are allowed to occupy themselves with nonstop game playing!

What happened to books, crayons, coloring, or puzzles, to name a few intellectual activities for kids? Now for all I know, that toddler could have been playing some intellectual learning games on the iPhone and learning his ABC’s, but the whole idea of lengthy electronic stimulation just bothered me. Is this new way that the younger generation is choosing to occupy children? How much is too much? What effect will it have? And the worst question of all… are handheld electronics the new “babysitter”?

As a Parent and Emotional Intelligence Coach, I know that the more kids interact with electronic objects, the lower their people skills and emotional intelligence. The long term effects of this can hurt their future.

Why? Because kids with lower EI (Emotional Intelligence) have been shown to be less happy and less successful as adults. We all have emotions that fuel our thoughts and behaviors. Kids can feel emotions while with electronics, but they will not learn how to acknowledge them, find internal skills to manage them, or overcome them. For these vital skills they must interact with engaging real life people and situations. The more the better!

I suddenly felt old, wishing that the ways in which I raised my son would be worthwhile to a new generation. Though electronics are vital in our world, I still believe that less is more for our youth.

I realize that I must respect a new generation of mindsets not to mention technology… one day I’ll have a daughter in law and I’ll need to understand and respect the way she might be thinking. Keeping the peace would be vital if I want to “keep” my son and his happy family!

Would any one like to start enlightening me how the current generation uses both old fashioned methods and new technology for kids? I’d love to know.

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Keyuri Joshi (pronounced Kay-yuri Joe-she) is an Atlanta-based Parenting Coach and author of the On The Ball Parent blog. She is not old and, so far, does not appear to be a fuddy duddy.

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