Happy Ground Hog Day. Hugs and kisses. Holding hands. Whispering and giggling. Friday night date night anyone?
Feb 022013
Feb 012013
By Esther Jantzen, guest poster
A great thing to teach children is how to get something done. Often kids want to accomplish something, but they don’t know how to start or where to get supplies or what to do next. Yet reaching a goal is a satisfying adventure! The first step is to imagine it completed just the way you want it to be in your mind. Once you clearly know what you want, it’s easier to take the next action steps.
Here are steps to teach your children:
1) Ask your children to tell you about something they really want. It could be a small or large goal, a skill they want to develop, an interest they want to expand, or something they want to own. For example, a child may want to build a tree house, be on a sports team, make a birthday card, have a special costume for Halloween, learn to ride a bike, dig a hole to China in the backyard, become a bird-watcher, own a pet, etc.
2) Ask your children, ‘What could that look like and feel like?” Let them pretend seeing it in their mind’s eye. Ask appropriate questions: Does it have a color? How big is it? How do you feel when you imagine having it? How would you use it? Would you share it with anybody? Would you need a place for it? What would happen if you had it or could do it? (It’s possible they may start by telling you what their goal is NOT like. That’s fine, as it may be part of the process of getting things clear.) Let them enjoy their imaginations, for the human imagination is creative, powerful, and useful.
3) Next, invite your children to talk about all the things or experiences they would need to reach this goal. Write down these ideas or steps on a sheet of paper.
4) Then ask your children, “What’s the very first thing you need to do to achieve this?” Guide them to identify one single next step. It might be getting a phone number, asking for help, gathering supplies, making space in a room, or starting to save money. Help them take that first step. And then identify the next one… and the one after that….
5) Support your children over time to stick with their goals by consistently encouraging them to take the next action step. Assisting kids to create a plan to go for what they want is a hugely valuable gift!
Reach for the Goal! supports the English-Language Arts Content Standards related to organizing information and sequencing ideas.
Esther Jantzen, Ed.D, is a mother, an educator and the author of Plus It! How to Easily Turn Everyday Activities into Learning Adventures for Kids available at www.plusitbook.com and the Way to Go! Family Learning Journal available through www.jantzenbooks.com
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Feb 012013
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Do you want your children to think of themselves as guests in your home or as vital family members who contribute to its daily operation? If you answered “family members making a vital contribution” then you might be ready to look at household chores with a new eye.
Chores are an important part of a child’s sense of independence, and help to teach that duties and responsibilities don’t have to be onerous and tedious. Kids who are assigned a regular slate of chores to complete will often find creative ways to get them done, and may even find newer, better ways to achieve desired results.
The simple act of completing chores on schedule can contribute to developing both discipline and a strong work ethic. Independence, responsibility, creativity and innovation are all traits that can enhance it.
Make Chores Fun
If you’re concerned about getting that roll-the-eyes, “you’ve got to be kidding” stare from your kids when you tell them they’re now responsible for taking out the trash every Wednesday, you’re not alone. But instead of threatening or grounding them for six months, try this: re-frame the chore to make it fun. A little motivation never hurts and helps drive home the idea that work is worth doing well.
If, for example, if one of the weekend mornings is devoted to weekly housecleaning, you could:
· Have a race – “Can you finish cleaning the bathroom before I’m done in the kitchen?”
· Play a game – Set a number of points per project… Add for ‘extra good work’ and/or ‘no reminders needed.’ Subtract for sub-par work. (Give a prize if you want e.g an extra bedtime story or 15 minutes later to bed for example.)
· Add music – “The first person to start Saturday morning chores gets to choose the music that we all listen to while we’re working.” (This is also a good way to check in on your kiddos’ taste in music from time to time.)
· Make a date to do something fun when everything’s done. (Give yourself “bonus points” if it’s fun and FREE like taking a walk, or playing catch in the backyard!)
Keep in mind that the important thing is that the child learns to do the task, rather than worrying about getting it perfect. Every successful adult interviewed for What Kids Need to Succeed shared responsibilities at home, and many had jobs outside the family to earn money.
