Modeling vs. Coddling?

Jun 182014
 

Lifelong learner hijacks Mom’s desk

 

Sometimes there’s a big gulf between adult goal-setting and the little bit we let our kids take part in. Reading this post about a child’s superior sales skills helped me think about the many ways we can improve our skills and connect with our kids at the same time.

Lots of families do homework together. What would happen if, instead of hovering over our kids to prevent the discomfort of error, we sat beside them, working on some of our own “medium concentration” tasks? What if we used the opportunity to consciously practice positive parental role modeling?

The next time the weather has you all stuck inside, why not try a family vision board session?  Perhaps you could use it to plan a vacation or a holiday gathering.  Or, have each person use it to plan a portion of the event and see how many you can incorporate.  Either way, creating in the same time and space offers a wonderful opportunity to learn about each other… and the visuals can be a big help with communication.

A family ‘walk and talk’ after dinner gets everyone outdoors, away from the TV or computer screen and moving around a bit.  And, if a more intense workout is needed, teens and tweens can be great accountability partners!

Want some help with meal planning and grocery shopping?  Perhaps part of your team has great computer skills and can surf for coupons?  Or maybe they can help use a site like All Recipes to find new uses for some of what’s hanging around in the pantry?  In addition to (eventually) lightening your load a bit, this is a great way to share learning about what we eat and what we spend: choices they’ll be exercising every single day.

It’s impossible to overestimate the impact of childhood lessons  — and especially the power of parental example —  have later in life.  And for those who have paired improving skills with having fun?  That’s a “win” in anybody’s book.

 

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Related articles

Getting Better Together

Aug 222011
 

Reading this post about a child’s superior sales skills started me thinking about the many ways we can improve our skills and connect with our kids at the same time.

Lots of families do their homework together. Lots of parents choose to work on tasks requiring a medium level of concentration around the same dining room table where spelling words are listed and 4th grade math is tackled.

Sometimes there’s a big gulf between adult goal-setting and the little bit we allow kids to take part in.  The next time the weather has you all indoors why not have a family vision board session?  It’s a great way for family members to get in touch with their dreams and aspirations.  And creating them in the same time and space offers a wonderful opportunity to know those things about each other.

(Note:  I use this tool, both personally and in workshops.  Personally, I don’t think there’s a “wrong” way but if you want help to start, check out this article by Martha Beck and this one by Christine Kane.)

A family ‘walk and talk’ after dinner gets everyone outdoors, away from the TV or computer screen and moving around a bit.  And, if a more intense workout is needed, teens and tweens make great accountability partners!

Want some help with meal planning and grocery shopping?  Perhaps part of your team has great computer skills and can surf for coupons?  Or maybe they can help use a site like All Recipes to find new uses for some of what’s hanging around in the pantry?  In addition to (eventually) lightening your load a bit, this is a great way to share learning about what we eat and what we spend: choices they’ll be exercising every single day.

It’s impossible to overestimate the impact of childhood lessons (and especially the power of parental example) have later in life.  Improving skills while having fun?  That’s a “win” in anybody’s book.

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Speaking of books… Have you seen Raising Good Grown-ups?  It’s now available for your Kindle or your iPad.

New Self Study Program Coming Soon

Apr 202011
 

I just realized that I’ve been quite absent from here…. but I think I have a good reason.

I’ve been putting the finished touches on a new self-study program called Inner Critic to Inner Ally: The Beginner’s Guide.

For many years I worked with people facing major life changes, often in traumatic situations.  For the past few years, my focus has shifted a little and now includes much more “performance improvement” — coaching and consulting to people who are doing well, but want to do better.

Why am I telling you this?

Because I’ve noticed that managing the little voice in our heads that say us “you can’t,” and “you’re not good enough,” or “don’t even try” is a fairly common challenge.  It intrudes into our writing, running our businesses, setting goals, and spills over into our families.  (You know, that “bad parent, guilty parent” voice?)

I realized that I had developed a collection of exercises and techniques that lots of people have been able to use to break up some of those mental roadblocks.  And, it’s taking me longer than expected to create the product and the format.

NOTE:  If I hadn’t sent her out to pick up lunch for the team, I’d insert a mean comment from my own Inner Bully here.  (Today I’m calling her “Barbie.”)

Anyway, it’s time to get off my own back and get back to work. Take a look at the cover… and I’ll let you know when it’s ready.  Whenever that is.

****UPDATE****

IT’S HERE NOW.  

 

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