(FEMA 5618 9-11 SAR Dogs. Photo credit: smiteme)
I gave a talk to a a group of businesswomen that evening. The topic was probably supposed to be how they could help victims of domestic violence. I don’t think I was able to do that but I was apparently able to use our collective shock and disbelief as the basis for a pretty competent talk about what happens to people when they experience random violence. It changes them. It changed me.
I spent part of the next day with my grandfather. The tragedy broke his heart. He said he couldn’t imagine anything worse. He left us a few days later.
When I went home it was to a man who was angry at the rest of us for ‘making such a big deal out of this thing.’
Random violence changes people. It changed me.
I no longer work in the field of child abuse and domestic violence: it made me a less effective human being. I am committed to doing things that work.
I wrote a book for parents — positive, uplifting, supportive.
My work now has to do with different way to help people (especially kids) to prepare for life’s ‘ups and downs.’ To be more resilient. More solution-focused.
I got single in a hurry.
I try to be more aware and more congruent — to do things that bring joy and add value. I do not view that as selfish but as necessary if I am going to improve anything for anyone else.
And when I wonder if I’m headed down the right road I think about how often the Dalai Lama laughs.
