Feb 012013
 
High quality ostrich feather duster

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Do you want your children to think of themselves as guests in your home or as vital family members who contribute to its daily operation?  If you answered “family members making a vital contribution” then you might be ready to look at household chores with a new eye.

Chores are an important part of a child’s sense of independence, and help to teach that duties and responsibilities don’t have to be onerous and tedious. Kids who are assigned a regular slate of chores to complete will often find creative ways to get them done, and may even find newer, better ways to achieve desired results.

The simple act of completing chores on schedule can contribute to developing both discipline and a strong work ethic.  Independence, responsibility, creativity and innovation are all traits that can enhance it.

Make Chores Fun

If you’re concerned about getting that roll-the-eyes, “you’ve got to be kidding” stare from your kids when you tell them they’re now responsible for taking out the trash every Wednesday, you’re not alone. But instead of threatening or grounding them for six months, try this: re-frame the chore to make it fun. A little motivation never hurts and helps drive home the idea that work is worth doing well.

If, for example, if one of the weekend mornings is devoted to weekly housecleaning, you could:

· Have a race – “Can you finish cleaning the bathroom before I’m done in the kitchen?”

· Play a game – Set a number of points per project… Add for ‘extra good work’ and/or ‘no reminders needed.’ Subtract for sub-par work.  (Give a prize if you want e.g an extra bedtime story or 15 minutes later to bed for example.)

· Add music – “The first person to start Saturday morning chores gets to choose the music that we all listen to while we’re working.” (This is also a good way to check in on your kiddos’ taste in music from time to time.)

· Make a date to do something fun when everything’s done. (Give yourself “bonus points” if it’s fun and FREE like taking a walk, or playing catch in the backyard!)

Keep in mind that the important thing is that the child learns to do the task, rather than worrying about getting it perfect. Every successful adult interviewed for What Kids Need to Succeed shared responsibilities at home, and many had jobs outside the family to earn money.

Feb 012013
 
School desk

(School desk Photo credit: net_efekt)

 

Here’s something from my inbox.  A friend sent it.  I have not tracked down the original source… mostly because I really do not want to believe that it is true.  I haven’t been able to throw it away.  There’s part of me that’s not surprised – after all,  some Moms will do anything for their kids!

A young teen gets into enough trouble at school to earn a detention.  When Mom learns about it, she offers to serve her child’s detention as she feels that this would be less damaging to her child than it would be for the child to miss any after school activities.

OK, aside from undermining the school’s disciplinary structure, what is wrong with this picture?

I believe that this Mom has absolutely the best of intentions on behalf of her child.  Clearly, she wants her child to have a variety of enriching extra-curricular experiences.  Unfortunately, Mom may be teaching some lessons that nobody should be learning:

  • Rules do not apply to me, but….
  • If I DO get in trouble, someone else will pay the price.
  • Dessert (extra curricular) is more valuable than dinner.

No parent wants a child to suffer, but it is still hard for me to understand the rationale behind this type of decision.  The sad thing is that lots of parents don’t stop and ask which hurts more – missing some afterschool activities or failing to learn that actions have consequences?  Perhaps even worse, teaching our kids to expect that they live in an impenetrable bubble where nothing ‘bad’ or ‘sad’ will ever touch hem.  Which is more damaging?  You tell me.

 

 

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Jan 272013
 

… from Michael, Robin and me!

 

Artist Statement - Michael

Artist Statement - Michael

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy Mothers Day !

Artist Michael J. Johnson (whose story appears in What Kids Need….)  sent a greeting and an invitation to visit Michael’s website.  

Years ago, I bought two small paintings by Michael and, in the process, made a nice connection with his mother, Robin.  As you might imagine, sometimes when I look at them I can ‘hear’ Michael saying “it’s not big deal”!

If there’s something you love send an e-mail and Robin (Michael’s Mom and business agent) will give you a special price for Mother’s Day!

http://users.psln.com/sharing/Michael/