Tired of Tearing Your Hair?

Mar 212010
 

If you’ve ever….

  • run out of answers for the kiddo who asks — about every 7.5 minutes — “Are we THERE yet?”
  • wanted a non-confrontational answer to “You’re not my REAL Mom.”
  • wondered how to cut down on “but Dad lets me….” conversations

Then check out the Blended Family Conference, coming to a computer near you on March 26th!  That’s right, you don’t have to go anywhere to get this information.  It’s available via simple downloads.  You and your spouse can listen from the comfort of your own home!

Marriage and family therapist Shirley Cress Dudley has gathered ten speakers — each with a different slant on helping you to make your blended family work better. And, while I haven’t asked everyone’s hourly rate, my guess is that ONE hour of time with one of these folks could cost as much as $100… and Shirley has brought TEN them together for a lot less.

By the way, these are not training sessions for therapists — they are tools that parents and step-parents can put to work right away.

I had a great time putting together, Why Blend When You Can Stand Out? Creating a Family That Works for All of You…. I know that with that one you’ll get a downloadable full-color guide to use for recording your goals for your family. (It sure beats arguing!)

I can’t guarantee that this conference is going to get your family to look like THIS….. but it can’t hurt!

FAMILY READING HOUR

Mar 192010
 
Reading to Zachary

Reading to Zachary (Photo credit: hoyasmeg)

by Esther Jantzen, guest poster

It’s great when children read about subjects that really interest them. Their knowledge and vocabulary expand. Kids start to read eagerly when they see their parents reading eagerly. So sit down and enjoy doing that together!

Here’s an activity to try:

1) Plan a family time when you make independent reading important (when each person reads something they choose on their own).

A weekend evening may work well, or try it on a slow summer day, after a holiday meal, on a rainy day, or when someone’s recovering from the flu and you want to keep things a little quiet.

2) Invite family members to bring what they want to read to the same room and get comfortable.

They might bring a magazine, a comic book, a novel, a newspaper, a technical manual, a cookbook, an atlas, a non-fiction work, a book about animals, a hobby manual, or anything else appropriate. Turn off the TV or radio.

3) Let everyone know that you’ll be spending at least half-an-hour together in the room, with each person quietly reading what interests them. If you have a child who is too young to read, let them look at a picture book.

4) After the quiet reading time, invite each person to talk about what they read, saying whatever they want to say. And if someone gets stuck or doesn’t know what to say, you can ask:

  • What’s something that you learned?
  • What did you notice?
  • What was the best thing about what you read?

5) You may want to serve a snack after the reading time.

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Family Reading Hour supports the English-Language Arts Content Standards related to reading comprehension, literary response, and delivery of oral communication.

Esther Jantzen, Ed.D, is a mother, an educator and the author of Plus It! How to Easily Turn Everyday Activities into Learning Adventures for Kids available at www.plusitbook.com and the Way to Go! Family Learning Journal available through www.jantzenbooks.com

Teaching Risk Management: Child’s Play?

Mar 022010
 
Playground

Playground (Photo credit: phalinn)

 

What is a sane and healthy level of risk when raising children?  How do we teach our kids to assess and manage risk without scaring the daylights out of either us or them in the process?  Where’s the balance?  Let’s go to the playground.

Think about the first time you took your little one to the playground and tried out a seesaw.  The little one had absolutely no about this piece of equipment, what it could do or what was about to come.  Picture what you (most likely) did next.

Parents often lift that small child and place her carefully on the high end of the apparatus.  We hold her there, mid-air, for a few seconds while she feels the thrill (and maybe a little bit of fear) that goes with being two feet tall and ‘flying’ five feet in the air.  She’s able to manage it because you’re standing there — between her and the ground.

Then, we stop.  She has had her introduction.  It was fun.  We quit while we’re ahead.  Enough for one day.

Fast forward to a time when that same child, now maybe six or seven years old, rides that seesaw like a surfboard, running from one end to the other and delighting in the loud CRASH that happens some time after she crosses the center of the board.

What has changed?

Her balance and coordination are better than when she was a toddler.    She has had more experiences experimenting with balance and gravity.  (It has been a long time since gravity outwitted her while trying to cross the living room floor!)

Part of knowing our kids means being aware of their abilities, strengths and fears.  As a proactive parent, I recognize that life is full of risks and that it is in the best interesest of my family to choose how and when to teach about it –at least as often as I can.

We teach risk management to our kids like we teach anything else — in small doses and matched to their age, skill-level and interests.  We send them to the end of a supermarket aisle to choose an item for the family shopping cart long before we sent them to the store.  What was ‘risk’ for a toddler is ‘baby stuff’ for a third grader.

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